well, i’d never been there. so i hopped on the bua booktour with the whole family and skipped a week of school right before finals! so unlike me but totally worth it.

got a shitty but cute apartment on christopher and 7th- right in the W. Village. See, I know names of neighborhoods now! bua says that chelsea isnt the gay neighborhood. christopher street is. and i had a gay old time.

they were selling these downstairs. so cute and so depressing. HALLIE get one.

bua and ruby and baby had the apt. across the hall.

i’ma get me one of these sweet rides. i love central park.

sister mom.

i dont even look scared or panicky. new york is not what i expected.

candle cafe. sweet potato, black bean, millet casserole with collard greens. so many vegan restaurants!!!

people are hella rich in NY. they dress their babies like this. even the headless ones. if i have any headless kids, they’re totally not gonna get to wear as cute of clothes as the ones WITH heads will. dont worry they won’t even be able to tell.

there’s a lot more wildlife in NY than i thought there’d be.

we went to the MET. this is one of my favorite painters, hieronymus bosch (15th c., Dutch)- look up garden of earthly delights. it’s even crazier.

so weird/amazing.

sacred chow vegan brunch!!!

bryan got banana bread french toast.

i got the soy cheese omelette. delicious.

rj came and played with me! he got waffles.

sarah is my new bff! that’s a jew sign, in case you didn’t know. duh.

the boys accompanied me to washington square park.

akira always tries to lick me without getting licked herself. she’s just like hallie. minus the whiskey.

#$*(^#^@#!*#^%$#(*&#$*(#^. she has a nasty sailor’s mouth too.

she took this one of herself. no help.

is it weird that my blogs are just about akira now? i’m obsessed. but everyone i showed her to there fell in love too.

she, however, is obsessed with my dad. one day when she’s old enough to understand, i’ll explain to her how he used to be in soft-core 70s porn.

i met an albino dog. so cute/ugly. look emily! long lost relative! minus the ugly part. oh god, bad analogy. love you.

this guy was selling his art. JUNK in multiple ways.

again with the licking!

one day my dad was looking at a NY mapquest page and akira (who is used to hearing LA directions) came up to the computer and pointed at the map and said “no, andy! you have to go left on Sunset!” she’s two1/2. genius.

dude came over to talk to akira.

he asked her whats up and she said “i play basketball” (which means she takes it on walks with her and i end up carrying it) and then “west side’s the best side.” told that dude!

b-girl freeze! remember the days when it was totally appropriate to do everything naked? i miss those days.

naked chill.

sink bath! man, kids are so lucky. sinks are way cooler than showers.

this is what it would feel like to go to NYU law school. it feels pretty good. it also feels like fat arm, which is a big no-no on ANTM. not that i ever watch that show. (every day).

this place just opened. it has vegan treats. and they deliver with a bike cart thingy.

yep.

i’d live/work there.

dude, girls just love my dad. (seriously though, imdb search “andy roth.”)

me and my sis’s friend charlie came out to play. my mom forced him to look at all her pictures from india.

ruby bua and two dollar falafel on mcdougal street!

my sis’s best friend from high school leah came out too!

then there was the bua book signing. sometimes when he’s doing things like date my sister, i forget how famous he is. and then i remember and like him even more. every single time.

akira was not to be outdone. justin and akira constantly compete for center of attention.

more folks from HS came out! guy and britt!

the new love of my life came out. we are going to have extremely jewish/ocd/addictive/cynical/hilarious babies. with no heads. and ugly clothes.

bryan came and took a lot of photos. of akira.

and i finally met elliot! lovebryan crew for life!

view from bryan’s eyes. its kinda like a camera erection. stop pointing that shit at me! man, not the first time i’ve said THAT.

one night i felt sick and left bryan at a restaurant with my family. but he and my moms made best friends. she kept telling him to wear a helmet.

me and public transportation! way.

agoraphobic claustrophobics love the subway. me and my pops.

NYPD hard at work!

<

especially this one. stop being a baby and go fight crime!

my mom is really good at myspace photography.

bowery street is really helpful. if what you need is a gawdy chandelier.

you know that you’re almost hip enough when you recognize names like “neckface.” i’ve made it!!!

i wish everyone could get along this well, combining forces to make multiethnic-items. so i guess go there if you need porcelain hoop earrings or catholic buddhist statues or rice candy covered in chili pepper, or just rice.

vegan sugar-free wheat-free gluten-free bakery! seriously delicious. i promise.

cupcakes!

they even have treats named after all my friends!

they put the kosher sign ON the cash register. come on now, thats just out of line. stop reinforcing jewish stereotypes!

YESSSSSS HALF OFF THE JEW IN ME IS SO HAPPY RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!! oh, crap.

mom and babycakes!

dad and thongs! obviously.

chinatown has lots of food i cant eat.

about to be dinner.

the tabloids are also way cooler than english ones. looks way more tittilating. ha! tit.

it rained until i got there, then everything was in bloom and it was 75 degrees and sunny and then the day i left it started raining again. suckers.

cafe viva upper west side vegan pizza!!

we love new york but apparently new york loves us too.

there were monuments put up for me all over the city!

everywhere i looked there were more and more…

seeing what it felt like to be famous. felt pretty good up on stage.

bryan keeps getting hit by cars. his bike is totally fucked up.

and everyone told me he seemed miserable when they visited him. but i went to check it out for myself and he seems to be doing fine.

BYE NY!!! oh also jet blue television is the best day of my life.

i’ll be back in brooklyn in july while hallie is there. who’s with me?!?!?!?

bye blog.
love chloe.