Christmas break was chill, mostly I guess. I whittled away the hours in my hometown of El Cajon, California, technically in Mt. Helix which is an unincorporated district of San Diego. El Cajon is the second most popular city in the nation for recovering crack addicts to go to, probably because they can get more crack. We used to have a prison until people started punching holes in the walls to get out, and now that building is the courthouse. Mama’s Chinese Food & Donuts closed while I was at school, but Ali Baba’s Kabob [sic] House repainted its exterior, so it’s chill. Mostly while I’m here, I try to keep my eyes closed as much as possible, eat a lot of Mexican food, hang out with whatever scant friends I have who are not currently and maybe never were meth addicts, and find as many crack-heads as I can while maintaining a comfortable arms-length distance.

Emily Kate Nathan moved away and is in Argentina right now. I miss her a lot!

Karen O misses Emmy a lot too. I bet Bob and Daniel also miss Emily a lot, but she probably won’t check my blog for another month which means that this sentence is going to sit here while a lot of people read it and maybe it will get awkward.

Flash-forward to Christmas morning, baby. Dad made these Dutch pancakes stuffed with pecans and maple butter.

Little Christmas nymph(o) swimming the wrapping paper seas.

We took a Christmas photo and I somehow managed to look like a sullen, chubby whore. Eat your heart out, family friends!

I forget what we were talking about during this photograph, but this may have been moments before a certain member of my family (not pictured) denied that global warming exists. It doesn’t though, right? Right? We can’t even predict tomorrow’s weather.